Seriously, someone explain David Blaine to me. Is he a magician? An illusionist? A middle child who didn't get enough love and or attention? Why does he insist on doing these ridiculous "stunts" that are just barely weird enough to be noticeable, but not magical enough to make anyone really care?
I mean, I get it. You held your breath for a million hours. Impressive, I guess. I think my issue is that these little feats of ridiculousness aren't at all entertaining to watch. It's not like when David Copperfield used to chain himself to a burning safe in a building filled with poisonous rabid snakes and strap a bomb to his face, then explode the building and wind up escaped and unscathed in the middle of a desert with the wind flowing through his hair and billowy white shirt (opened to the navel, natch).
And if I'm being totally honest, I think his face has something to do with why I dislike him so much. The eyelids, to be exact. He's a heavy-lidded fellow. And it just gives me the impression that he walks around all day saying things (in a monotone voice) like "oh, it's soooooo hard being me. I have to live in fish-bowls and hold my breath and put myself in a box and live there without food for a long time." He just looks so put upon all of the time.
Whatevs. My new theory is that he's an attention whore who's just jealous of Miley.
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