"America: It's like Britain, only with buttons"-Ringo Starr, 1963

"Tell me, what do those pound-note thingies look like? And do they still make those cute-like half crowns? Maureen does the shopping, but she just uses a card which says 'this is money'".

-Ringo Starr, quoted in a 1968 interview for my Beatles "textbook", the Hunter Davies Beatle biography. Too bad he's the cutest in the land And he makes up phrases like " a hard day's night" and used to call his step-father his "step-ladder" when he was little. I also think it is so cool that he was the favorite one when they first came to the US. Which, come to think of it...as a country, apparently we STILL have a penchant for funny looking millionaires with accents who misuse words and were hardcore into drugs!! RINGO FOR PRESIDENT! So let's tell a Ringo story, shall we?

So I don't even pretend to be this lifetime Beatles fan or anything. I mean, I never hated them, they were just kind of always there. My dad used to sing "I've Just Seen A Face" and "Till There Was You" to me when i was little (yeah, he was a Paul guy, he apparently liked him because they both played bass. Sure dad, whatever, you just jumped on the whole "Cute One" bandwagon, but I'll forgive.) I loved the song "Back in the USSR" when I was younger, though, plus "Let it Be" and "hey Jude" have always been on the favorite song list. But I digress. The point is, I will be the first to admit that it's the Beatles class that has caused this change in my musical interests. But, now that I have taken this mammoth class on them and learned all of this crap, I have this huge appreciation for them as a band, and for everything that they did for the music world. Which is why this confession is so. Damn. Embarassing.

So I think that I mentioned this, maybe in e-mails at the time or something, but I had some (minor) brushes with the rich and famous while in London (nothing like my roomate did. Story of my life, I am NEVER in the right place at the right time. FOR ANY THING.) ANYWAY, I saw Stella McCartney twice during my lunchbreaks on the Strand (oooooh Beatles connection! But that's not the big one). We saw some guy from Dashboard Confessionals or something at Wagamama's one day. I saw Elijah Wood by Trafalgar square. And as far as my internship at TIME, i interviewed some scottish mountain climber, who I am sure is famous in his circle, but I was more concerned with understanding what the hell he was saying, which was INSANELY HARD. But one day, this one reporter in the newsroom asked us all to keep it down because he had to interview someone, and the little thingy that you attach to phones to record phone interviews wasn't working, or they were all being used, or something. Anyway, the point was that he had to do some big important interview and he had to put the phone on speaker and record it that way. Ok, cool, whatev, i am too busy trying to check a story on cheese in Argentina or something to really care. And theeeeeen I hear a voice, one of those voices that is so distinct that it is pretty much universally recognized.And I totally said to myself, in my head, "heeeey...that's Mr. Conductor!"

Yeah, you heard me correctly. RINGO STARR is on the speaker phone with my co-worker, and I am thinking about Shining Fucking Time Station. BEFORE I GET HIT IN THE FACE WITH THE OBJECTS THAT EVERYONE IS GOING TO START THROWING AT ME, in my defense, unlike pretty much any of my friends, I had a little brother born in the mid 90's. The soundtrack to my early teenage years consists of Barney and any other show on PBS. So, yeah. Embarassing! And I admitted to it on the internet!! Because I need for others to learn from my harrowing ordeal, lest history repeat itself. By the way, he was so cool, like crazy nice and friendly to this reporter; granted, it was TIME, and people tend to be cooler when you say you are calling from TIME magazine than when you say you are calling from The Bear Facts or something. But this guy was just a regular reporter, no one super important. So, yeah. This is my Beatle story. To make you forget about this confession, I will now present this picture of Sexy Ringo. BAM-you are too confused by the shorts to even remember what I just told you!!

PS: Not Beatle related, but the other day I got out of class and looked at my phone, only to see a missed call. The number? 00-1246 or something like that. No kidding. I was freaked out, I thought that like God was trying to call meor something. And then I got a message and it was Natalie calling!! From Israel!! On her computer!! (I still don't know how that works, though) And she sang me a tornado song!! About hoping that I didn't get blown away!! Wahooooooo!

PPS: While looking for Ringo pictures, I found this:

And doesn't this look like it could have been taken, like, last week? Because I totally know at least 15 guys with this exact haircut. Granted, you probably won't find any of them wearing a pink towel and a gun holster but still.